Can Depression Stem from Everyday Childhood Experiences?

We often overlook how seemingly harmless behaviours can contribute to mental health challenges in adulthood. Sometimes it’s the more subtle, everyday experiences that shape us. Things like rarely being praised or feeling like you had to earn love in your family can stay with you. Over time, these kinds of events can build into low self-esteem later. 

At Healing Voices Psychotherapy, we see those who are struggling with depression but can’t seem to point to a single cause. Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy can help create a more cohesive self that is better skilled at coping with everyday challenges and stress.

What is IFS Therapy?

IFS Therapy is a psychological approach that sees you as made up of different “parts”; like the structure of a family composed of various children and head parental figures that all work together to form a whole group. These parts are often kept out of our awareness yet continue to deeply influence our daily decisions and actions.

For example, you might have a part of yourself that’s critical and another part that feels anxious around others. Or there could be a part of you that wants connection, while another part pushes people away to avoid rejection. All these parts developed for a reason, often shaped by early life experiences, even the ones that may not have seemed like a big deal at the time.

Everyday Interactions Can Have Lasting Effects

You don’t need to have gone through major trauma to feel depressed. Even subtle experiences in childhood, like not feel heard or only being praised for achievements, can shape how we see ourselves. Over time, these parts of us internalize beliefs like “I’m not loveable” or “My needs don’t matter.” These kinds of beliefs can fuel depression. 

Five Sub-Parts Often Linked to Depression

While every person’s system is unique, there are a few common parts we see in people struggling with depression.

1. The Hopeless Part

   When experiencing hopelessness, we often feel stuck in a negative frame of mind believing that things will never get better. This part can make life feel grey, with no possibility of it ever changing.

2. The Guilty Part

   When things happen in our lives that are out of our control and have no cause, it is easiest to blame ourselves. This part can carry shame and constantly questions your worth.

3. The Irritable Part

   You might snap at others or feel constantly annoyed. This part is often overwhelmed and exhausted from holding in so much.

4. The Unmotivated Part

   When everything is hopeless and appears that it will always remain that way, it’s hard to feel inclined to do anything at all. 

5. The Indecisive Part

   It may harder to make simple, everyday decisions when feeling depressed. This part fears making the wrong choice and being judged, even for small decisions.

You Are More Than Your Feelings

The heavy feelings that you are struggling with are coming from parts of you that are trying to protect you, or that are stuck in old pain. Further isolation will only reinforce existing depression or worsen it. But you can take the first step to discovering why a part of you feels the need to isolate, and you can start to heal.

Improve with IFS Therapy

It’s not always easy to get to know these internal parts, especially ones that feel intense emotions. That’s why working with a therapist trained in IFS can feel powerful. Together, we’ll explore the different parts of yourself to create the whole individual that you desire to be. 

At Healing Voices Psychotherapy, we offer therapy for depression rooted in Internal Family Systems. Reach out to us today to book a free 15-minute consultation to get started on your journey toward healing and understanding yourself more deeply.