Struggles of a First-Generation Canadian: Finding Belonging Between Worlds

When your identity feels torn between two cultures, being a first-generation Canadian becomes a quiet, complex experience.

It’s not always loud–the tension, the confusion, the weight of expectation. Sometimes, it hums beneath the surface: in the pauses before answering a question, in the way your name is mispronounced, in the feeling that you don’t fully belong here or there.

Even if you grow up speaking both the language of your heritage and the language of your peers, the work of translating yourself–your values, identity, and truth–never really stops. 

What Does It Mean to Be a First-Generation Canadian?

Being first-generation in Canada means growing up in a culture your parents didn’t. You often become the bridge between generations–the one who fills out forms, makes sense of school systems, and mediates family expectations with societal norms.

You may carry your family’s hopes for stability, success, or safety while also trying to shape a future that reflects your own desires and values. It can feel like being the memory-keeper and the innovator, all at once.

Straddling Cultures and Shaping Identity

First-generation identity is often layered and shifting. You learn to speak differently at home than you do at school. You celebrate holidays that your peers don’t understand. You carry your culture like a second skin, sometimes proud, sometimes itchy, sometimes invisible.

The struggle isn’t just external. It’s internal. Your identity is asked to bend, soften, shrink. But you are allowed to expand.

You may feel both deep gratitude for your family’s sacrifices, but also guilt for wanting something different. That emotional tension is real, and it’s a common part of the first-generation Canadian experience.

The Weight of First-Generation Expectations

Many first-generation children become cultural translators, emotional anchors, and silent achievers. There is honour in these roles, but also heaviness.

You may be expected to succeed in a system your family doesn’t understand. You may be told to remember your roots while trying to grow new ones. This push and pull between two cultures makes forming your identity more complex, and can cause stress and burnout.

Still, your voice matters. It’s okay to need space. It’s okay to question. You are not here to be anyone’s perfect reflection, you are here to live your full truth.

Navigating Culture in a Multicultural Country

Canada prides itself on diversity, but multiculturalism doesn’t always guarantee belonging.

You may hear your culture being praised in public yet questioned in private. You may be told you’re “so well-spoken” or “not like the others”, in ways that seem like compliments on the surface but isolate you deeper. You may be praised for “fitting in” while losing pieces of yourself.

Holding on to your culture while navigating Canadian life is not a contradiction, it’s an act of resilience. 

First-Generation Identity Is a Work in Progress

There’s no one way to be first-generation.

What matters is that your identity is yours. Whether you wear your culture openly or quietly, whether you’re still searching or finally grounded, you belong.

Speak the language you know, even if it’s a mix.
Own your culture, even if it looks different now.
Let your first-generation identity evolve, beautifully, imperfectly.

A Gentle Practice for Cultural Reconnection

If you’re feeling disconnected or unsure of who you are, try this exercise:

• Write down the parts of your culture you want to keep.

• Draw your identity as a bridge—who stands on each side?

• Name 3 ways being first-generation has made you stronger.

You are the seed and the soil. You are the future and the memory.
And your culture lives on in everything you carry forward.

Ready to Explore Your Identity in a Safe, Supportive Space?

If you’ve been struggling to balance your cultural identity, family expectations, and personal goals, therapy can help. 

At Healing Voices Psychotherapy, we offer culturally sensitive therapy tailored to the experiences of first-generation Canadians. Our therapists are here to support you on your terms.

Book a free 15-minute consultation today and begin reconnecting with yourself.